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THE TALE OF THE PUMPKIN KING by MyNmeHere Here now lies the tragic origin of Mynme, otherwise known as the Pumpkin King. A while back, about a year before he came to Never Winter, Mynme was working with his clan on a new mine near the Pumpkin Farms of a town known only as Gourdville. One day, as Mynme was working hard near the entrance of the mine, he grew suddenly hungry, which was quite strange since he had eaten breakfest only 2 hours ago. He looked arounf for something to eat but saw only the nearby pumpkin patch. Now this patch was very special, for it was said that the finest Gourds always grew there for the site was protected from rot and decay by a spirit from another realm, and that any that tried to take one of the pumpkins unbidden, would recieve the worst punishment imaginable. Being at the time not quite as light-hearted, Mynme disbelieved these stories, no one had ever seen the spirit anyway. Mynme checked to make sure no one was looking, and moved over to the pumpkin patch for just ONE little pumpkin to satisfy his appetite. But as he came to the first pumpkins, he noticed that each had a little bit of rot on it, so passed them by. BUt when he came to the next row, these appeared to have rotted as well. He searched and searched but could find NO untainted gourds. He cried out, "Is there not one pumpkin in the whole patch that is healthy!" And then he saw it. It was the most perfect pumpkin he had ever seen, just the right size, nice and round, not a blemish to be seen on its whole surface. The leaves on it were fresh and green, and Mynme's mouth watered. "I cannot eat such a pumpkin in haste, I will take it and tonight will have a dinner of pumpkin pie." So hiding the beutiful pumpkin in his pack, he returned to the mine and worked the rest of the day away. Later that evening, a warm scent of pie could be smelled from the home of Mynme the dwarf, and his neighbors became very suspicious. Heedless, Mynme pulled the pie out of the oven and sniffed the fragrant fumes. The pie appeared to be as perfect as the pumpkin was itself. He carefully slices the pie and puts a forkful in his mouth. A taste of maggots and refuse mixed with the taste of rotten flesh assaults Mynme's tastebuds, his body racks with agony as the poisoned pie worked its way through his digestive system. A voice enters his head, "Such is the fate of all who would take but the one healthy pumpkin and leave the rotting ones for the rest! You shall die knowing that if this pie had been as you thought, no one would have had a good pumpkin pie come harvest." Desperatly, unable to talk, Mynem thinks to himself, hoping the voice will hear him, "Wait! Please!! I didn't mean to! I was just all of a sudden so hungry...." The voice pauses in its monologue of doom, "Hunger? When did this hunger overtake you?" Seeing he may possibly still live, Mynme tells the voice, "Thats the strangest thing, it was only two hours after breakfest, and I'm usually not hungry until a little after noontime." The voice is silent, though Mynme gets teh impression that its thinking. "I have checked, and you seem to have been magically altered, in the digestive track no doubt. I am sorry this had to occur, but the poison you have eaten is irreversable. There is nothing I can do." "NO! NO please I don't want to die!" "Well, there is one way...." "Please! Please, I'll do anything!" "I can save you in only one way, and that is if you take my place." Mynme seems confused, "How can I take the place of a spirit?" "I grow weary of guarding this patch, and I must chose a suitable succesor. Seeing as how this is my mistake, I chose you. From know on you shall have dominion over all gourds, and are sworn to protect and grow them. YOu must destroy all gourds that are rotten, er they contaminate the enitre patch. This title and power I bestow upon you, you are now....... "THE PUMPKIN KING!" Mynme finds himself in the middle of the patch, alive and well. Yet he felt strangly changed, he discovered that he now had complete control over the enviroment in his patch, and relized as his powers grew, he would someday have control over all pumpkins, and eventually, over plants as well. Yet that was not the only change, though he did not notice at the time. The quick transfer of power from the spirit and his departure had made him slightly insane, and legends grew afterwords that in the night an exstatic giggling could be heard coming from the direction of the patch. For about 9 months, Mynme ruled his patch and kept it clean of rotten pumpkins. Then, it began to happen. It was unuasully cold for this time of year, and Mynme was having a hard time keeping his pumpkins alive. He heard tales from his former clansman who loitered near the patch of strange happening in Never Winter, that an eternal winter would sweep the realm. Even in his own insane mind, Mynme relized this could be trouble. Protecting his own patch was not enough, if something was not done, all the pumpkins of the world could be destroyed. Hoping the farmer who planted the patch would understand, Mynme left his patch and returned to his normal dwarf form, leaving his patch under a limited protection spell. He entered Gourdsville and bought what he would need for the journey. As he set out, he had only one thought in his mind, "The Gourds of the world must be protected, and as sure as I am the Pumpkin King, though my powers yet wane away from my patch, I shall destroy those that threaten them." Munching on a slice of pumpkin pie, a small part of a supply that must last the whole way, he set out on the long road to Never Winter. The rest is mostly known, and Mynme's power over Gourds is now almost non-existent so far away from his patch, but he continues his crusade against those that seriously threaten pumpkins. He has made many friends in his crusade, but must one day return to his patch, so that his promise may continue to be fulfilled. But he is now, and always....The Pumpkin King!!!!!
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THE RETURN OF MYNMEHERE by MyNmeHere
Nme hobbles back into the square, and ogles at the incredible number of new faces. He shakes his head, "Things have changed." As Nme hobbles over to Mataga's for a good stiff Pan-Galactic Gargle Blaster, he recalls why he had to -ehem- sidetrack a bit.... After he and the Pumpkin Spirit had their little falling out, he'd turned to the second most important deity in his life, Lady Luck, Tymora. After spending a couple weeks learning the ways of worshiping Tymora (which seemed to consists of flipping coins and taking care of it yourself), Nme felt divided, and decided to return to the good ole Pumpkin Patch. After a couple of weeks of travel, with only a couple of randomly placed Black Dragons in the way (The darn things just won't leave me alone) Nme reached his destination, and was horrified by what he saw. Weeds littered the patch, and the dreaded pumpkin rot had infested each and every single gourd. Nme dropped to his knees, crushing an overripe zuchinni, and noticed a grinning figure standing in the middle of his once lush pumpkin patch. "Well well well," the figure cackled, "The prodigal dwarf has returned. As you can see, you abondoning your precious Pumpkin Spirit has not been without it's, repercusions." As the figure grinned, Nme noticed that the figure was dripping with maggots and bits of pumpkin, and drew in a breath as he relized who stood before him. The Spirit of Pumpkin Rot, the antithesis of the Pumpkin Spirit. The Spirit saw the recognition in Nme's eyes, and cackled anew, "You think it was an ACCIDENT that you turned hungry that day? And ate the fatal poison that forced you into the life of Acting Pumpkin Spirit? FOOL!! It was I who made you eat the pumpkin, for I knew that you wouldn't stick to your word! You have allowed me to finally destroy the Pumpkin Patch! Now, I have enough power to destroy the entire realm of Gourds!!! MUHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!" Tears filled Nme's eyes, he had been a fool. He had abandoned his faith, and now was paying the price. As he prepared to lay down in despair, knowing no one could help him now, he remembered the only thing he had managed to learn at the Temple of Tymora, "Help yourself, and Tymora will help you." Nme's mind raced, nothing normal could affect a Spirit, but then he remembered the most pointless, near useless item in his pack..... "Keep on laughing Pumpkin Rot, but I havn't played me last ace yet," as The Spirit began laughing anew at this meaningless threat, Nme pulled out his Frying Pan, and as it began to glow a dull orange, he tossed it at the Cackling Rotting Pumpkin, "Feel the wrath of the PUMPKIN KING!!!!!" "NOOOOOOOO!!!!!!" The Spirit tried to dodge the deadly pan, but as it hit his skin, a stench of burnt pumpkin pie began to billow from him, "How is this possible! This can't happen! No! NO! I'm not done here yet! NOOOOOO!!" A brilliant flash of light emitted, and as it dispursed, Nme saw a heartwarming site. Gigantic pumpkins abounded in the patch, the weeds he had seen before were now non-existent, and one of every type of gourd, bloomed. And in the center of it all, in his trusty frying pan, was a burnt, rotting, pumpkin pie. Filled with sudden inspiration, Nme walked up to the pie and ate it.
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THE RETURN OF GEORGE by MyNmeHere Ecstatic giggling could be heard all around the city, and as you look down the street, you notice Nme walking down the street, wrestling with a racoon that seemed to be attached to his face. "Alright alright George! I'm glad ta see's you to! Now get off me ear!" Nme continued to giggle as George positioned himself in his backpack, and stared excitedly at all the people and places he hadn't seen in awhile, chittering and eating a peanut. It was weird being a racoon, but George was glad to be back :)
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THE GNOME MASSACRE by MyNmeHere Nme fell to the cobblestones as the gates of Neverwinter closed loudly behind him. He'd been lucky they'd let him in. The Elk Men had been very busy while he was gone, but maybe he could do more here then he'd been able to do back home.... He'd recieved a message from Smitty one night, his old friend from growing up with the Gnomes in Pumpkinville. It was scrambled and frantic, not like Smitty at all. All he was able to get from the note was "trouble" and "Spirit of Pumpkin Rot," but that was enough for Nme to know he was needed. George peered questionaly at him, and chittered. Nme smiled faintly, and handed the Racoon a cashew, "Well old friend, I guees we'll be doing a little traveling." He slipped away quietly that same night, knowing that if anyone else knew, some would insist they come and help, and every possible man was needed here. He left a note carved into a series of pumpkins, saying simply, "The Pumpkin King Will Return." Nme's journey was anything but uneventful, run ins with orcs, wizards, and the occasional killer bunny rabbit. But these memories were fuzzy, he'd become somewhat jaded to the slaying of monsters since he'd come to Neverwinter, and these encounters barely broke a sweat. As he got closer to his home valley, Nme saw a familar pumpkin farm, and decided to stop over. As he got closer he noticed that the house looked abandoned, and weeds were growing everywhere in the garden. Nme's brow furrowed, and he drew Flamer. He opened the door and peered inside, just in time to see a crossbow bolt hit the wall in front of him. "Don't move. Put down the sword and turn around SLOWLY!" Nme whispered to George, who jumped out of his pack and ran off into the woods, then dropped his sword and turned around to see the one who had addressed him stop another man from shooting at the racoon, "Let the rodent go fool! It can't do anything, don't waste your bolts." The leader looked at him, then laughed at the top of his lungs. "So! The dwarven prodigy returns eh? I think you'll find things a bit different since the last time you were here brother." Nme stood speechless. This couldn't be his brother, when he'd first left home, his little half-brother George had been the kindest, gentlelest gnome in the village. But there was such hate in his eyes now.... "Stop looking at me like that!!" The gnome leveled his crossbow at Nme, but then seemed to regain control, "Your lucky I'm under orders to bring you to the master, or else you'd be dead where you stand dwarf." George gestured his head at his companion, who moved off into the valley. "You don't know how long I've waited for this brother. You'd always been the favorite, even though you weren't really their son. I WAS THEIR SON!!! You always had all the luck, you even had a god look favorably on you. Well, I have my own god now." Nme remained silent, and didn't resist as a troop of gnomes came and took his equipment, and stood still as they put him in chains. As they began to lead him away, Nme finally spoke, though only in a whisper, "I didn't mean to hurt you....." George spat on him, and they walked in silence until they reached a large tent. The gnomes shoved him into the tent and left, leaving him in darkness. A famialar voice rang out, "Good to see you again Pumpkin King." "Pumpkin Rot..." "Oh! You remembered! How nice. Did you REALLY think you could defeat me with a frying pan? Oh it hurt of course, but still! The Pumpkin Spirit has really got to choose his champions more carefully. As you can see, I've had my revenge, you'd be suprised how many dissatisfied gnomes there were in this village. As you can see I've ruined everything you ever cared for, your parents are dead, your brothers turned against you, and your hometowns under my control," at this the Spirit paused to peer at me, "Oh yes, and that note, after we forced Smitty to write it, we killed him of course. Ah, I see that was totally unexpected. Yes, I think I've tortured you enough, we can kill you in the morning now. George!" Nme's brother walked in and grabbed Nmes chains, "Yes sir?" The Spirit of Pumpkin Rot gestured, "Take him to that old ruined hovel you once bothe called home and set a guard, he dies in the morning." George bowed, "Yes sir." Nme sat in the house with his head hung. This was it then, the Spirit had won. His brother had turned, his family and friends were dead, and soon he would be to. He only hoped his George was safe....... All of a sudden, Nme heard a chitter behind him, and that mischievous little visage peered at him. Nme grinned, "Nice try George, but you can't chew through chains." Then George dropped something shiny he was holding in his paws. "Why you little rascal...." He couldn't believe his luck. A coosh job like this, guarding a dwarf in total chains, and probly gettin a medal for it. Yep, though Vlestreg, life is good. "Pssssssst!" Vlestreg turned, "Eh?" "Over here! I brought you some pie for your watch..." "Why thanks friend! You don't know how hungry I wa.. OOF!" The gnome guards uniform was a tight fit, but he'd have to make do. He had to get his things and get out of here. Nme told George to wait for him in the woods and made a beeline for the tent where they were keeping his equipment. Most of the camp was either drunk or asleep, some even seemed to be both. This was gonna be easy..... "You there! Stop!" Nme froze, then tried to make himself sound as much like a gnome as possible, "Yessir?" "You new around here? I don't think I recognize you." "Justjoinedupsir. Yepnewrecruitthat'smeyep." "Your not from around here are you? Turn around please." Nme cursed to himself, he'd spent to much time around Scree and the other gnomes, he'd forgotten that the gnomes here didn't talk like that. He drew his sword from the guard and turned. "Hey! Your not a gnom....ERK!" Nme wiped off his blade and made it to the tent without incident. It was good to wear his armor again. He turned to leave, and there was George, both of them. "Trying to escape eh brother?" George held the racoon by the neck, "Lucky for me, this rodent ain't as stealthy as he thinks." Nme drew Flamer and took a fighting stance, "Let him go, this is between you and me." George grinned maliciously, "Gladly." He tossed the other George to the ground and drew his blade, which flared up with the power of ice. Nme activated the fire of his blade. ((The following fight scene has been edited. Before this flashback could go to press, it caught the attention of Lucas Arts and was seen as an obvious Lightsaber Duel rip off. It was either cut it or pay 100,000 dollars. We now resume the normal story, thank you for your patience.)) A tear fell from Nme's eye as he saw his brothers body aflame. That was the most epic, exciting, nailbiting fight he'd ever had, he just wished it hadn't been with his own brother. George pulled on his leg, and the racoon pointed with his paw at the forest. "No George, theres one more thing I must do." Nme walked towards the Spirit of Pumpkin Rots Tent, and took out one of his pumpkin bombs. "George, get into my pack, this is gonna be ugly." Nme lit the bomb and ran towards the forest even as he lobbed it into the tent. An explosion rocked his ears as he dived into the trees, and as he turned to look, all he saw was a large crater where his village had been. Nme sighed, put up Flamer, and began the long trek back to Neverwinter.
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